… you can’t buy a single top or bottom sheet anymore? HOW COME bed sheets are almost always sold in sets, when every fool knows that sheets don’t wear out in sets. A bottom sheet gets more wear and tear than a top.
And where is it written that top and bottom sheets have to match? Maybe I want a white sheet on top and flowers on the bottom. Or maybe I don’t want a top sheet at all. Maybe I use a comforter. You know what I think? It’s a conspiracy to make us spend more money.
HOW COME I never lose a PAIR of anything? HOW COME I only lose ONE earring or ONE glove?
You know what I think? Designers and manufacturers should sell earrings and gloves in sets of three and more.
HOW COME clothing designers are possessed with wrapping striped fabrics horizontally around our bodies rather than vertically … when every fool knows that horizontal lines make thin people look fat and fat people look like trucks. You know what I think? Clothing designers are in cahoots with the diet industry.
HOW COME after I say “thank you,” no one says “you’re welcome” anymore? HOW COME I’m always answered, “No prob” (= no problem)? Trust me, I know it’s “no prob.” If I thought “it” was going to be a “prob,” I would never have asked in the first place!
HOW COME no one writes songs with singable tunes anymore? Or songs with comprehensible lyrics? How come today’s songs can’t be repeated? HOW COME all the songs sound the same? You know what I think? They ARE the same. I don’t think there have been any new songs since 1995. It’s just the same old song being recycled under a new title.
HOW COME cars run into trains? Aren’t trains big enough for drivers to see them coming? You know what I think? Departments of Motor Vehicles should add train crossings to road tests.
HOW COME no one’s ever at fault anymore? How come when something goes wrong it’s always someone else’s doing? You know what I think? We have a blameless society. No one is responsible -- not to themselves and not to anyone else.
HOW COME the more contraceptive methods and devices available on the market, the greater the number of abortions? HOW COME with THE pill, diaphragms, condoms, night-before and morning-after pills, patches, shots, rings, rods, and sponges readily available, there are more and more unwanted pregnancies? You know what I think? Like I said above – “no one is responsible anymore – not to themselves and not to anyone else.”
HOW COME with the growth of communication devices, people communicate less and less with each other?
HOW COME every time I find a cosmetic I like, the manufacturer either takes it off the market or repackages it, simultaneously shrinking the content and raising the price?
HOW COME every time I tell a friend I like the way her hair looks, she tells me she’s on her way to get it cut?
HOW COME there are more and more blow dryers in public bathrooms when research shows that paper towels are more effective and efficient. Blow dryers not only spread germs from 3’ to 6’ but use more energy than paper towels, and dry your hands out.
Know what I think? It’s a cost-cutter for management.
HOW COME I get twice as many red lights on days when I'm running late than I do when I have all the time in the world?
HOW COME my lists never get shorter? HOW COME after I’ve gone to the post office, the food store, the pharmacy, seen the dentist, and returned stuff I shouldn't have bought, the next day’s list is even longer than the list from the day before? HOW COME my lists never get shorter?
HOW COME? …
….. I DON’T GET IT.
….. DO YOU?
Whiningly yours, Carol